Being a mummy is….being the adult!

Yet another post from me where I beg of you not to judge me….


Well, trying really hard to be the adult, that is!!

But in most times, if you’re me,…..

……. it’s a total and utter failure

We seem to have the silliest of arguments in this household.

Not necessarily arguments as such – just bickering and squabbling I would say.

Lately, for some completely random and unknown reason, Holly has started calling us ‘Poo-Poo’.

How lovely is that!

She finds it hilarious!

Us? Less so!

It’s pretty much all the time now too – which at first was highly amusing and we giggled under our breath to one another, but recently it’s really started to get a bit boring and grate a little!

Especially when our parents (their grandparents) – frown at us as if we’re the naughty school children making up silly names!

Anyway, one can only handle being referred to as ‘Poo-Poo’ for a short amount of time before something kicks off!


So, as ever the adults we are in our household, now, every time she calls either me or Mr B ‘Poo-Poo’, we say,…

‘Yes, Dave?’!

Which really annoys her.


She throws all her toys out of her pram and storms off in a huff and a paddy to go and sulk for a bit.

But then returns, only five minutes later, when it begins all over again!!


Yes Dave?

And this can go for a while until she too becomes bored with her mummy and daddy, and decides she can get far more sense out of her baby sister who calls her,


Yup – complete gobbledygook!

Grown up, aren’t we?

And then, earlier this week there was another incident….

Where H and I pretty much bickered all the way back home from my parents’ house.

(OK – so only a five minute journey)

Basically, Mum asked H if she would give her kiss goodbye – to which my stroppy ‘three going on thirteen year old’ replied with….

‘Just go’!

Poor old grandma looked deeply hurt and upset!

Ok – she was tired, and ok she didn’t want to go home probably as she always has too much fun at Grandmas (obviously unlike her permanent abode eh!!), but it was rude none the less and, as the competent and well-meaning parents that we are, we’re trying to instill just that tiniest amount of good manners into our progenies and educate them as to….

‘how one should present oneself when in social situations’!!

So I asked her nicely and calmly, not to be so rude and to apologise to poor Grandma.

She then burst into floods of tears.

And when I asked her what the matter was, in an attempt to try and calm her down and to frantically get her to stop crying before the little one joined in too and jumping merrily onto the breakdown bandwagon, she just sniffed and sniveled to me and told me it was all my fault, and that ‘I had started it’!

Like the proverbial rag to the bull…

…I saw red!

Not in a temper way, just in a silly, immature, school playground sort of a way,

All of a sudden, I was no longer 37 years of age – I was three – just like she was!!

So – in true nursery school quarrel style, I snarkily replied with

‘I didn’t start it – you did!’

A-ha! That will stump you, I thought

So then, yes, you’ve guessed it – for the next ten minutes on the way back home, that was the entirety of our conversation…..

Me: You started it

H: No you did

Me: Why did I start it?

H: Because you told me off

Me: Yes, because you were rude to grandma – which is why I think you’ll find YOU started it!

Yep, So mature!

And no – I’m not proud!


Then, unfortunately there has been an occasion (or two) when I’ve outdone myself.

And acted a whole lot less mature than our adorable 3 year old, H!!

Please don’t judge me!

I promise I’m a nice person really and quite a good mummy!

But, to explain…..

…..there have been times where she has not quite gotten her own way, or where I’ve had to say ‘no’ to a third in a row episode of Dora, or ‘no’ to an ice-cream, five minutes before bedtime, where she has then grumpily turned to me and said…

‘Mummy – you’re not my best friends anymore!’

(complete with folded arms, death stare scowl and appearance of humungous bottom lip pout)

Now this gets to me.

It hurts my feelings and cuts deep into my heart.

And yes – I’m well aware that she is three and doesn’t mean it etc etc, but I’m afraid to say I’ve responded by saying…

‘No worries…

Then turned to Little E and said

‘E – you’re my best friend now as H doesn’t love me anymore’

Does this make me a really bad person??!!??!!

And an even worse mummy?

Am I going to turn my children into little monsters with no manners or respect because of this?

I hope not.

There’s just no reasoning with a three year old – which I must keep reminding myself is totally natural, the norm and meant to be.

I think the problem obviously lies with me and I just need to start acting my age!

I promise to try and do better!

(holding up three fingers in true Brownie Girl Guide fashion!)

See….that’s a proper promise!

If anyone wants to try and make me feel a little better by saying they understand, or in fact, have similar bickering matches in their household, I would love to hear from you xxx

Linking up with Debs at Super Busy Mum for this weeks Mad Mid Week Blog Hop

And the lovely Jenny at Let’s Talk Mommy for ‘Share with Me’



  1. Surekha
    10th February 2016 / 4:40 am

    That was really fun.I have a 2but old boy.things like this make parents so happy.

  2. 6th January 2016 / 4:45 am

    Haha, I love this! I have arguments with my three year old all the time and it frustrates me no end, he can be so difficult!

  3. 18th August 2015 / 9:17 am

    So funny! One of my boys has a new trick of going up to people pretending to give them a kiss and then licking them on the face instead. I’m dying of embarrassment.

  4. 17th August 2015 / 1:02 pm

    Haha this is so funny! I can’t wait to get to that stage! We have a 1 year old boy, and I’m sure he will love the word Fart etc! Great read! Suz x

  5. 15th November 2014 / 12:23 am

    I’ve just read this again and I STILL love it. You are a comedy genius! #SundaysStars. Hugs Mrs H xxxx

  6. 11th November 2014 / 10:51 am

    I’ve just had a good old laugh at this!! How funny! I resort to childish behaviour in arguments too sometimes and have to rein it in a bit! I love the Dave part, that is absolute genius! Don’t worry, you’re just like all the rest of us :))

  7. 9th November 2014 / 10:05 pm

    What is it with the word poo? My 4yo has periods (usually after school) where she call every thing and everyone by their name followed by poo (e.g. mummy-poo). It drives me nuts!! I know that I should just ignore it but it just makes me crazy. Great post xx


  8. 9th November 2014 / 8:26 am

    ahh i always get the your not my best friend anymore I’ve taken to responding with no your right I’m your mum now do as your told lol i always seem to get in little rows with the girls after a bit of back an forth i have to say look I’m not arguing with you your 3 years old haha but it is so east yo be drawn into it!

  9. 9th November 2014 / 8:02 am

    sorry but this is funny . I have this to come . I can totally understand how you end up with those conversations.

    • 24th November 2014 / 9:48 pm

      Unfortunately, ‘those conversations’ are becoming a lot more frequent – so I feel for you that you’ve got all this to come. But it’s totally fun at the same time, and it’s great to be able to write a post about it!! Tee Hee!! Thank you so much for your comment and so sorry for late reply. Steph xxx

  10. Mini travellers
    25th August 2014 / 8:18 pm

    I am this mummy every single day. I need to be better but I’m not! Great post.

    • 1st September 2014 / 5:33 pm

      Hahahaha – I think there’s a little bit of this in every parent out there – even if they don’t like to admit it! Tee her! xxx

  11. 25th August 2014 / 7:51 pm

    Hahaha, I love this! My 3 year old has said that I’m not his best Friend anymore too when he gets cross! He’s funny becasue he always cracks first if I pretend that I don’t mind. He’s really good at saying sorry… I hope it lasts. And I know what you mean about poor grandma. It’s the same with my mum. 3 going on 13… Imagine if yours and mine met?! Hilarious! X

    • 1st September 2014 / 5:53 pm

      Oh my gosh – could you imagine!! That would be carnage!! Though as long as we keep the grandparents at bay we might be ok!! Tee Hee! xx

  12. 19th August 2014 / 10:07 pm

    Oh I can relate on so many levels! I have been where you are a few times now and soon to be again with my toddler, who by all accounts seems to be heading into her terrible twos a little earlier than expected!!! Thanks for linking up with MMWBH xx

  13. 13th August 2014 / 8:41 pm

    This made me laugh! We are not at this stage yet, but I have no doubt I will do exactly the same! xx #MMWBH

    • 17th August 2014 / 6:35 pm

      You just wait! And I can’t wait to hear all about it! Hahaha xxx

    • 17th August 2014 / 7:07 pm

      Glad I could make you giggle!! Thanks for the comment xxx

  14. 13th August 2014 / 5:36 pm

    We have all done it especially when we have our second and third child. Using them in our immature fights with our toddlers. I love it. No you are an amazing mommy and we all do this trust me. Sometimes we have to resort to immatureness to stay sane. Thanks for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme

  15. Caroline (Becoming a SAHM)
    13th August 2014 / 3:27 pm

    Very funny post and maybe it’s a sign of my immaturity but I don’t think your responses are immature at all! Like you say, you can’t reason with a toddler, so, sometimes maybe it just isn’t worth trying! Monkey at just 2 is only really getting to grips with talking at the moment so no bickering quite yet… although I can definitely feel it brewing! xx #mmwbh

    • 17th August 2014 / 7:06 pm

      Oh gosh – you just wait! It really can just get you so riled up (though as I say, in a funny childish way, not angry way) that it just sort of slips out!! I’m glad you are in my ‘immature’ camp – and can’t wait tip Monkey starts chatting as I want to hear all about it!!! Teehee!!! xxx

  16. 11th August 2014 / 8:07 pm

    Do you need to go to ‘timeout’ for a little bit and think about what you have done? Ha ha ha this is so funny (as always) you do make me chuckle!! I am dreading this from the twins….how awful will they BOTH be to me? *Sobs already at the thought!* x x

    • 11th August 2014 / 8:16 pm

      It sort of gives an insight as to the maturity of my husband and I! Not sure we ever grew up!! And, oh gosh! Yes, you’ll have the double whammy won’t you!! And I can’t wait to hear all the funny posts from you too!! It sounds a nightmare but as with everything, we still love them (ish!) xxx

  17. 11th August 2014 / 8:04 pm

    I think calling her ‘Dave’ is a brilliant response. i don’t think I would know what to do in these circumstances and it is always so awful when they act up in front of their grandparents. You can see the judgement in their eyes. Ugh! Hugs Mrs H xxx

    • 17th August 2014 / 7:04 pm

      My kids (Dave and Bob) seem to be acting up quite a bit at the moment! I am full on dreading our four hour flight to Greece in a couple of weeks!!! Arggghhhhhh!!! xxx

  18. 11th August 2014 / 7:54 pm

    Ha ha so funny to read as an outsider, I have boys and they are older but at times they frustrate me so much, doesn’t that make us human? And yes I to retaliate, surely thats our duty as parents not to roll over and accept what they say. where would we be then, if we let our little lovelies rule the roost x

    • 17th August 2014 / 7:20 pm

      Exactly – perhaps I’m just laying down the ground rules as such!! Its good to know we’re all quite alike really – as you say – just human I suppose!! Thanks so much for commenting xxx

  19. 11th August 2014 / 1:44 pm

    Reading this made to chuckle, I have the same bickering arguments with my 3 year old lol! Your scene in the car is so similar to the ones I tend to have with M. Sometimes I just can’t help myself but whined her up even more, then regret it when she has a full blown strop! I don’t think we are bad mummies, we are just human beings trying hard to guess how to raise children. It is pure guess work right? we have no manual or do’s and don’ts. We need to have some fun along the way! right?

    • 11th August 2014 / 4:17 pm

      Oh I am so glad its not just me then! I do feel a bit bad afterwards, and that I should totally know better – I just can’t seem to help myself!!! Its all guess work isn’t it as you say. As long as we do it jestingly, and not in rage or anything – I think thats ok. xx

  20. 11th August 2014 / 11:33 am

    Ha ha, I have a 3 year old as well. His favourite name for everyone is ‘smelly poo’. He thinks it’s funny, it’s not. But he’s just a 3yo. I’m hoping he grows out of it before he’s 7!

    • 11th August 2014 / 4:14 pm

      Yes – here’s hoping along with you then. I must stop giggling at the beginning!!! xx

    • 19th February 2015 / 9:33 am

      Nope they don’t grow out of it at 7 lol although my son plays up with his little sis and starts getting silly lol x

      • 29th May 2015 / 10:24 pm

        Thanks so much for your comment Shannie, and I’m so sorry for the late reply. Things have been pretty horrific in the Midlife Mummy household these past few months and are only just starting to pick back up again. Thanks again lovely, Steph xxx

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